Rhythm in Blue Page 8

  Taking the box from his outstretched hand, she looked to the ground, and said, “I’m sure it will be more than once in a while.”

  “Open it.”

  Shelby stepped into the shade of the cliff and sat down on one of the large, granite rocks. She opened the box as Rick took a seat beside her. Pulling the lid from the box, and seeing his Puka shell necklace inside, she gave an excited squeal.

  “I know you said you wanted one.” Giving her his own seemed a more personal gift than buying her one. Shelby pulled the necklace from the box, turned to Rick and threw her arms around him. The sudden sensation of her cool skin against his sent shock waves through his body, and he surrendered to her embrace.

  “Thank you,” she said, her hot breath in his ear made his hair stand on end. He held her for as long as he thought he safely could, silently cursing his erection. She’s not making this any easier. Yet, her reaction to the gift was exactly what he wanted.

  When he tore himself away from her arms, she handed him the necklace and turned her back to him. “Help me put it on,” she said, lifting her hair up out of the way. Rick reached around in front of her to grasp the end of the necklace, and found his lips were so close to her he felt his own breath reflecting back from her neck. His hands shook, and he found it difficult to secure the clasp. Goose bumps covered her skin, a reaction to his breath, and suddenly he struggled to catch that breath. His head swam, and he could hear Devon’s warning, “Love will make you do stupid things.”

  He gasped, mumbling, “It’s too hot, I need a swim,” and dropped the necklace into her lap. Rising slowly, he walked to the sidewalk, pulled his shirt over his head, kicked off his sandals, and carefully eased himself over the edge. When he was certain Shelby could not see him from the waist down, he stripped to his swimsuit and charged into the water, but the sudden coolness didn’t relieve his hard-on. He had a notion to disappear behind one of the large rocks, and tend to it, but saw Shelby was right behind him, diving into the water. As she broke the surface in front of him, Rick noticed that she had quickly managed the necklace on her own. He was afraid she might touch him again, and he wasn’t sure he had the resolve to resist her a second time, but she stopped short of him. She ran her hands over her forehead and back through her hair, squeezing the water out as she went. Finally, lifting the necklace away from her neck, she said, “Rick, thank you. You don’t know how much this means to me.”

  He smiled, “I thought you’d like it. I tried to get all my hair out of it.”

  “I don’t mind, it’s better that way,” she said, just as Rick hoped she would. Looking embarrassed, she changed the subject. “So what did you think of Morgan’s work?”

  Rick laughed and shook his head. “Let’s just say… it was unexpected.”

  “I know, not quite up to the hype, is it?”

  He shook his head again, wanting to convey that he had little regard for Morgan, and Shelby’s grin showed that she got it. “She says you spend a lot of time at her place during the winter.”

  “Not really. I did when she first came here, but I figured out pretty quick that a little bit of Morgan goes a long way. She’s always trying to get me to come out to her house and visit, or even hang out with her in town. Sometimes I do just because there’s nothing else to do, but usually I tell her I’m busy, or grounded.”

  She stood quietly after that, caressing the surface of the water with her hands. Her downcast eyes and pained expression hinted she had something to say that caused her distress. At length, she stammered, “I…I don’t know why I did that last night…”

  Rick wanted to tell her she didn’t need to explain, but Shelby continued. “I think I was angry because it looked like she had sucked you guys in, she does that to people. I guess I forgot that one of your qualities is seeing people for who they really are.” With that, she finally looked at him. As Rick stared into her eyes, he could see all she felt in her gaze.

  Taking a step toward her, Rick lifted her trembling chin with his fingers. The sound of the world washed away, replaced by the rapid bump, bump, bump, of his heart. A sudden altered gravity pulled at his mouth, urging him to meet her waiting lips. What would happen if he kissed her? How could they proceed from that moment on without things spinning out of control?

  Shelby’s hand grasped his waist, pulling him forward. As their breath met, Rick veered to the side, barely glancing off her lips with his, brushing across her cheek to her ear. He whispered, “No one will ever outshine you, Shelby. It’s just not possible.” Though he stopped the kiss, he couldn’t help but pull her into his arms, melting against her flesh as she held him close. After pressing his lips to her forehead, he finally pulled away, careful to avert his eyes from her flushed face. He swam away, sensing he’d shown her too much, praying he could drag his misguided-self back to the right side of the line.

  ~

  Later, as he bathed and prepared for the evening, he recalled every moment of their meeting in precise detail. He thought about the flood of emotions when she looked into his eyes, when his lips feathered past hers, the feelings he had when attempted to put on the necklace – those lustful feelings, he avoided. Even in the privacy of his own mind, he could not go there. If he wandered that way, guilt quickly stopped him. Only acting on those urges, even imagining them, would make him that something he did not want to be. He’d come freakishly close to it already. As long as he focused solely on his affection for her, he would be safe.

  As he dressed, he wished he’d been more open with Devon. To have a confidant he could share his feelings with might make things easier. Devon wouldn’t understand, though. His former troubles with a young girl stemmed from her deceit and his lust, there was no mutual affection. The only other person he could think of who would understand was Shelby herself, and that discussion was off limits.

  He skipped dinner with his friends, deciding instead to keep to himself for the time being, and take pleasure in the new high that came with his emotions. He found a quiet place on the beach and watched the sun set as he considered the experience. The euphoric feeling wasn’t what he expected. He always imagined love came with an exceptional sense of happiness, but he did not anticipate that it would completely consume him.

  Devon’s earlier comment about his tail thumping the floor was a perfect description and made Rick chuckle. He couldn’t look at her, couldn’t even think about her, without smiling and feeling overcome by an electric sensation. In her presence, he finally felt like the man he wanted to be, the man he could be, no longer a stranger in his own skin.

  When the sun was well below the horizon, he checked his watch, and decided he should find Devon and at least check in so he didn’t get ideas about what Rick was doing. He left the beach and headed for the Islander.

  ~

  “Where’s your necklace?”

  It never occurred to Rick that Devon would notice the absence of his necklace right off the bat, but it should have. Devon saw everything, nothing ever got by his notice, and while usually a good thing, it was currently a pain in the ass. Rick’s first instinct was to tell Devon he misplaced it, but as the words sat on the tip of his tongue, he realized Devon would see Shelby wearing the necklace eventually. All he got out was “I…”

  The speakers surrounding the dance floor blared Donna Summer’s Bad Girls, and the explosion from the bass was making it difficult for Rick to find his story for Devon. Ah toot toot, ah beep beep!

  “I gave it to Shelby,” he finally blurted in exasperation. “Something to remember me by… a present, I guess. I thought it might make up for my ending our lessons so suddenly.” Devon looked at him through narrowed eyes and slowly nodded.

  “Beer Ricky?” Erin called to him from where she was stocking the cooler. He nodded in reply, and when she brought him his beer, she asked, “Where’s your necklace?”

  “He gave it to Shelby,” Devon answered for him.

  “Wow, you’ve worn that necklace forever. In fact, you look naked without it.” />
  It was dawning on Rick that everyone who knew him would notice its absence. When the idea first came to him to give it to her, all he’d thought about was how happy it would make her.

  “You must have really become attached to her,” she finished, cocking her head to the side.

  He considered explaining how he’d found a kindred spirit in Shelby, but instead answered, “I suppose I have.”

  Erin looked thoughtful for a moment, and then Rick saw the comprehension slowly spread across her face. “Last night was about you!” She shook her head furiously, “I can’t believe I didn’t see it – oh my God, Ricky, what are you going to do?”

  “Nothing,” Devon again answered for him, “They are done with the lessons, and he is going to keep his distance, right?”

  “Yep,” Rick answered, nodding emphatically.

  “Good, I’m glad to hear it. That’s a road you definitely don’t want to go down.”

  “I know, but don’t worry, it’s under control,” he laughed and tried to think of the right things to say to stop any suspicions. “I’m a big boy, and I’m used to this kind of thing, I know how to let ‘em down gently.”

  Erin looked relieved, but Devon’s expression never changed.

  “Speaking of which, I need to get out of here.” Rick guzzled the last of his beer, “I don’t want to stick around too long in case she shows up here.”

  “Good thinking. You want some company?” Devon asked.

  “No, I’m just gonna walk around for a while and then go back to the hotel, but thanks for the offer.”

  “I’ll come anyway, I could use the exercise,” Devon said, as he too polished off his beer.

  “Okay then,” Rick tried not to sound annoyed. His mind went to work to find a way to ditch Devon as soon as possible. He didn’t want Shelby to have to wait too long.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Where’s Judy? Where’s your dad?” Rick looked around as Shelby led him into the living room.

  “They went camping with some friends.”

  “And left you here on your own?”

  “Yeah, right” she said, rolling her eyes, “No, I’m supposed to be staying with Morgan. She’s got other things on her mind, and she doesn’t really care what I do, so I’ve just been staying here.”

  “I guess I don’t blame you,” he said. “Randy’s been out there almost every night since they met, I suppose it would be pretty awkward for you.”

  Today would be one of their last lessons. He was leaving the island in three short days. Rick was aware that as the remaining days grew fewer, his heart grew heavier. Judging by her quiet disposition, Shelby felt it too. Their conversations were short, each afraid they might become too emotional. Rick tried to keep the atmosphere light, but found it increasingly difficult each day.

  “How long are they gone for?” he asked.

  “They’ll be back day after tomorrow. They wanted to make sure they could see you guys before you leave.” Shelby looked away. He knew she didn’t want him to see the emotion that accompanied those last words.

  Attempting to change the subject, Rick picked up the guitar and handed it to her, “Play me what I showed you yesterday, I want to make sure you practiced like you were supposed to.”

  She took the guitar from him and sat down, settling the instrument on her thigh. She played the chord progression effortlessly, but rose again almost immediately, setting the guitar aside, unable to focus on the task. Standing before him, she searched his eyes for a glimpse that he shared her despair. Rick couldn’t tear himself away from the challenge of her gaze, though he tried to hide the feelings she might see there.

  “Rick, I can’t let you leave without –”

  “Don’t,” Rick cut her off. Her eyes pleaded to let her continue, but Rick shook his head, repeating softly, begging her, “Don’t.” As tears began to well up in her eyes, Rick reached out and gently brushed the hair away from her face, his hand grazed her cheek before it fell to his side. Without warning, Shelby lunged for him and pulled him close. She pressed her lips to his, hungry for his response. The urge to resist her was fleeting, and Rick yielded immediately, returning her passionate kiss. All the impulses he struggled to suppress came boiling to the surface – he was powerless against them.

  He allowed his fingers to run through her hair and his hands to touch and feel her body, caressing her as the waves had. Shelby murmured his name between her short breaths, but somewhere, deep in the back of Rick’s mind, was another, almost inaudible voice, shouting, “Stop!” The voice was not Shelby’s, and he didn’t listen. The voice grew louder and more adamant the longer he kissed and touched her, and Rick realized the voice was his own, imploring him to stop. As he willed the voice to be silent, he unzipped her dress and kissed a path down her neck. With his fingertips brushing over her shoulders, he eased her dress down her arms, so that when he stepped back, it fell to the floor. She stood before him, nearly naked, and again, the voice commanded him to stop, and again he ignored it as his trembling fingers reached for her flesh.

  ~

  Rick trudged through the village streets, not knowing where to go. His thoughts spun out of control and his head swam as he wandered toward the sea. The people he passed as he made his escape greeted him, but all he could hear was his own echoing, heartbeat. He left her there, lying naked on the bed, her legs still spread, and his betrayal reflected in her eyes, but still, he dressed and left without a word.

  When he reached the Paralia, he turned north, away from Shelby’s chapel under the rocks. He could not look at those he passed, certain they could see the disgrace on his face. He silently cursed the shame. Where had that shame been when he watched as her lips and tongue traveled over his body? The ecstasy of it still gave him chills and quickened his pulse.

  He stopped at one of the ice cream shops lining the waterfront and bought a liter of water. The shopkeeper called after him to give him his change, but Rick wouldn’t risk holding out his trembling hand or meeting the man’s eye. They shook the same way when he explored her delicate curves, when his hands sought to possess her.

  His thoughts tortured him as he walked along the waterfront, no destination in mind, just a need to escape. The magnitude, however, of what he allowed to happen, was too great to escape. How could he have let this go so far? He could have stopped, but chose not to. Anger overtook the shame as he thought about having to look himself in the mirror, face his friends, and live with the knowledge of what he’d done – it seemed overwhelming.

  He passed the fishing docks, the scent of marine decay thick in the air. Fishermen, trying to escape the heat of the day, hoarded the scarce shade to mend their nets. They squatted under dry-docked boats and behind tall piles of nets. Lost in their work, they didn’t notice his passing or the cloud following him.

  The docks gave way to sandy beaches crowded with tourist. He could smell the Hawaiian Tropic on the breeze as it cooled the sweat on his brow. Children played at the water’s edge, building sand castles, throwing Frisbees, playing paddleball. Young women strutted along the beach in bikinis, hoping to catch the eye of handsome suitors.

  After a time, Rick looked up and saw he had walked nearly halfway around the bay, and he could see the village across the water. He was beyond the fishermen, the tourists, and the beaches. He was finally alone. He found a tree nearby and sat in the shade.

  She wanted it, he reasoned. She had come on to him. He was only human, after all. He imagined what Devon would say if he knew, and his warning echoed in Rick’s ears. He dreaded the look of disappointment Devon might bestow on him if he learned of the transgression. Rick always looked up to Devon and sought his approval. Letting him down was a constant concern.

  And Erin…she looked up to him. How far would he fall in her esteem if she knew what he had done? After she had been hurt at such a tender age? Rick opened the bottle of water he still held and poured some over his face, and then drank until the bottle was empty. No one knows, no one ever has to know.


  But he knew, and from that, there was no escape. And Shelby knew. She would never think of him the same, after he left her there, betrayed and alone.

  The memory of her touch returned, chasing away his remorse. His pulse raced again as his mind replayed the scene of Shelby pushing his shorts below his hips. When she dared to return his caresses, he allowed his fingers to tickle and play in the growing wetness between her legs. As the memory returned, so did his erection. He unzipped his shorts and eased his hand inside, far from civilization, in the shade of the tree. He remembered the taste of her, the feel of her hands on his skin, the electricity of her lips. Shelby’s breath had quickened as he laid her back on the bed and gently spread her legs, but this time, under the tree, he didn’t stop when he saw the flash of fear in her eyes. He didn’t leave her lying on the bed, legs still spread – no, this time he whispered, “I’ll be gentle,” and he made love to her.

  Chapter Twelve

  “What’s wrong?” Devon asked, again.

  He asked all day the previous day as well, and each time, Rick answered, “Nothing’s wrong, stop asking me that.” Rick had come to terms, as much as possible, with what happened between Shelby and himself, but the cloud that followed him around the bay that horrible day was a constant companion, trailing him mercilessly. The fact that he hadn’t followed his lust all the way did little to alleviate his guilt.

  “Well, something’s going on with you, I can tell.”

  Devon wouldn’t stop staring at him, so Rick assured him it was nothing more than sadness at leaving Erin. “Who knows when I’ll see her again, it could be years.”

  “Are you sure it’s Erin you’re worried about leaving? It seems to me there’s more to it than that.”

  “Of course it is, and I know what you’re referring to. That’s not it,” he said, trying to look resentful.